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Thread: To be back home , and wondering...

  1. #1
    Meadow's Avatar
    Meadow is offline Senior Member
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    Unhappy To be back home , and wondering...

    This has took me about 15 attempts to phrase this

    Is it true , that i read or heard somewhere, that if you have been in NZ for 18 months, then you cannot go back until 18 months ?
    Stay away the length of time youve been, or something like that?

    I am really trying my hardest to adjust to life back here
    I am thoroughly enjoying the things ive missed
    But
    When i was in NZ and thought about places id like to visit in Glasgow,or things i missed etc i got a wee empty feeling in my stomach
    Now
    Im here in Glasgow, and i think of things in NZ, i get so sad and hollow and the empty feeling is massive

    I know its early days, ive only been back 6 weeks
    I have honestly tried to look at the positives here, and sometimes i can convince myself that i am back here for a reason, blah blah
    We have even been quite fortunate in getting a 5 apt house, in what people keep telling us is a good area, and we have done well etc etc

    But why do i keep getting this sadness?
    I know Colin would go back in a minute
    Ive tried to convince myself, that life is better here
    Now im really not so sure

    How hard would it be to go back?
    Or am i crazy for even thinking that
    Meadow

    Landed in New Zealand 29th jan 2008
    Colin got job offer 21st feb
    Work Permit applied for 3rd march
    Colins work permit received friday 2nd may 2008
    Dated till jan 2010
    My work permit applied for 7th may 2008
    My work permit received 27th may 2008
    Dated till jan 2010


    Arrived back in Scotland 21st July 2009

  2. #2
    MotherBear's Avatar
    MotherBear is offline The missing link
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    Quote Originally Posted by Meadow View Post
    This has took me about 15 attempts to phrase this
    This has taken me about an hour to compile with all the interruptions I've had.

    Oh dear! I wonder how many other people have felt the same . I know for sure that quite a lot have regretted the decision to move back home. However, you are in a different position because you were more or less forced out because of your situation, so there are other matters that need to be focused on before you think about returning.

    To keep your spirits up and work towards something positive, you'd need to assess your circumstances and ask a few probing questions e.g. Have we enough money to return? Has the job situation in NZ changed for the better or are we going to end up in the same pickle again? Is it worth uprooting the kids from school again in the short term? etc. Once you can see clearly how you stand, put a plan in place so you have a timeline and suitable period to gather a financial safety net around you. I doubt you'd be able to think about going back until your finances have recovered sufficiently from the battering they had in NZ. So plan no. 1 would be to stash away as much cash as possible (no robbing banks, please ). Plan 2 is for Colin to concentrate on the NZ job market and see how it's looking. It isn't really the best time to go back anyway until the recession dies back and things are picking up all round. The job market will need time to recover and kiwis might eventually drift back overseas to work again, so the pressure will be off once more, some skills might go back on the shortages lists and things will return to normal.

    Generally, anyone on a visit visa has to stay out for the same length of time that they were in the country, but you weren't on a visit visa. I would hope that, if Colin could get another job offer, you could once again apply for a work visa and return to NZ. However, INZ appear to only be issuing work visas for 1 year at a time which doesn't give much security. If I could advise you, I think I'd say to hang on for a while before planning on going back and make the most of the time you have in the UK by putting yourself in a stronger position than last time. Maybe, in time, you'll find you are settled down in Glasgow again and not want to return to NZ after all. You're possibly in a grieving mood right now because you were very happy in NZ until things started to go wrong and it wasn't your original decision to go back home. The last thing you want to do is to repeat the experience. If, in the end, you find you do still want to go back to NZ and you have the funds and a job offer to carry it off, there is probably no reason why you couldn't do it. Just learn from what has gone before and you'll end up stronger and more knowledgeable about how things work. You certainly wouldn't be the first family to discover that what you've left behind in NZ is what you really want in life. And not the first ones to go back, either.
    Mother Bear

    Try to bloom wherever you are planted.

  3. #3
    zummerzet_lou's Avatar
    zummerzet_lou is offline your flexible friend
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    You have only been back 6 weeks (that has passed very quickly hasn't it?), and in that time you have gone through an enormous upheaval - new country, new schools, back living me your folks, now house-sitting and then a new home. It's not surprising that you are feeling unsettled.

    Give yourself a little more time, without so much going on. Then, perhaps you need to start formulating your mid-long term plan ... if you are going to return to NZ, you were talking about getting qualifications to enable you to get PR. If so, in what?

    Are Open University Degrees acknowledged by NZIS?

    How are you and Colin settling in .. and getting back to "normal" life?

    Give yourself a little time, and then, if you are still feeling l like this, then maybe it's time to start making some serious return plans. In the mean time, enjoy being near your family,

    all the best - we're still missing you guys (James was dressed as Spiderman yesterday!!)

    Lou
    EOI Submitted 8th July 2007, 140 points no job offer.
    EOI Selected 18th July 2007
    ITA pack received 12th Oct 2007
    Completed ITA posted to NZIS 26th November 2007
    Case Officer assigned approx 22nd Feb 2008
    Immigration interview 7th May 2008
    PR AIP 10th May 2008
    Arrived in NZ, August 13th

    Check out our website -> http://the-clarks.freehostia.com/

  4. #4
    Meadow's Avatar
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    Thanks MB and Lou

    Yeah i think thats what its been, a case of too much happening and i panicked a bit

    Colin was the one a few weeks ago, who said he would go back in a minute, and i rhymed off a list of reasons why we shouldnt
    Now im the one who is pondering again

    Colin has a good chance of a job roofing here, through my brothers pal
    Im applying for a care assistant job in hospital which can lead into nursing
    Wee Colin is settling into school good
    We should be getting the keys to new house in next couple of weeks
    I think it is just all a bit overwhelming, and im panicking trying to get the money for our furniture to get shipped over

    Also i still miss my wee dog terribly, i cant beleive how hard that has affected me
    Her new owners havent sent me a pic yet, i wish they would, then id see how happy she was and just get on with things

    I forgot how busy Glasgow can be, and again, its all a bit daunting at times
    Especially when you meet folks who knew you, and all say same things like its a shame etc
    THey are being kind and sympathetic, and most admit they wish they had the bottle to try it
    But going over it again and again

    Also got an email from one of Colins mate who he played football with in CHch, and he has given us his friends contact details, who could point us in right direction , if we ever did decide to go back

    If we did decide to go back, it would be at least 2 year or so, have to get money sorted out, and pay back family
    We would apply for pr from this end first, as then we would be sure we want to live in NZ permanatly

    Im hoping when we do get into this house, and both get out working again, then we will settle back into life here.
    As i am enjoying most things, and actually appreciating things i took for granted before
    Just get the wee what ifs every now and then

    I think it is just the realisation of whats actually happened kicking in, and sometimes i get a sinking feeling, when i realise im back here,sometimes i feel as if all my dreams are over
    Then i just give myself a shake and snap out of it, as i still beleive it all happened for a reason, just dont know what reason yet

    But thanks again guys, just feeling a bit blue the other day
    And Lou we miss you guys too x
    Meadow

    Landed in New Zealand 29th jan 2008
    Colin got job offer 21st feb
    Work Permit applied for 3rd march
    Colins work permit received friday 2nd may 2008
    Dated till jan 2010
    My work permit applied for 7th may 2008
    My work permit received 27th may 2008
    Dated till jan 2010


    Arrived back in Scotland 21st July 2009

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