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Thread: trying to alay the fears of my daughter...

  1. #1
    nattydread's Avatar
    nattydread is offline God like figure
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    Default trying to alay the fears of my daughter...

    We hope to be in New Zealand by this time next year..

    My daughter is, Lauren, is 6 (7 next month) and she has said she's worried about leaving her school friends and all behind when we make the move..

    I wondered if any of you that have already made the move from the UK to NZ have any daughters (or sons) around the same age that would be willing to become her pen pal..(via email ..a lot cheaper!!!)

    She loves being out and about, she is football daft at the moment and has recently made her debut for the local team..(Milton Rovers!!) She had her first sleep over last night and her favourite film is Scooby Doo 2.

    Hopefully someone can help her..

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    Glenda's Avatar
    Glenda is offline All Knowing Deity
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    Default trying to alay the fears of my daughter...

    Hi,

    I haven't got a daughter that age any more so I cannot really help you and my sons are younger and older. I did wonder though whether your daughter is a bit too young to be worrying about moving to NZ? A year is a long time for a child and she should not be stressing about it at her age. It may be that she does not comprehend that entirely and thinks you will be taking her from her friends sooner.

    My daughter (11) has been e-mailing other kids going to NZ but found it 'boring' after a couple of days. My 9yo son's attempts were abandoned even earlier due to his and their younger keyboard skills. Personally, I would cut back on the talk of moving when your daughter is around, she really need not worry about it until a couple of weeks before you move! Girls stress about their friends anyhow and are forever falling in and out of favour with their friends. The subject will probably be all-consuming for many more years to come (and then it will be boyfriends). :icon_rolleyes: :icon_lol:
    Glenda
    In NZ since June 2005
    Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness - Chinese proverb

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    kokopeli is offline God like figure
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    Default trying to alay the fears of my daughter...

    Hi Craig

    I think Glenda raises a good point

    [quote:dbdf668d8b]I did wonder though whether your daughter is a bit too young to be worrying about moving to NZ? [/quote:dbdf668d8b]

    But kids are naturally inquisitive. Our three are aged 7,5 and 3. Obviously, the youngest one has no idea, but the eldest two have taken a real interest in NZ, not least because they're rugby mad.

    I know you said your daughter likes footie, but wouldn't you prefer her to tell you she wants an All Blacks shirt rather than a red coloured football shirt? (I won't name names, don't want to offend!)

    Try this link to show her the Haka - it's fabulous
    http://www.newzealand.com/travel/app...x_content.html

    Let us know what she thinks :icon_lol:

  4. #4
    NickampJacky Guest

    Default trying to alay the fears of my daughter...

    Hi Craig

    Our two daughters are 7 & 8, we are hoping to get to NZ in Sept 06. Because it is such a long way off, they dont seem too phased about it. Although when it rains (as it often does) here in Cumbria, they ask if we can go sooner! They have talked about going there, and do worry about loosing touch with friends, in reality it will only be a handful that they will miss. I would agree tha its best if you dont mention it too much, or when you do, focus on the positive aspects for kids (of which we all know there are plenty!)....such as hokey pokey ice cream, beaches & sand castles, the fact that footy is shown alot on Sky tv in NZ etc, it will probably at a level thats more appealing & digestable to a little mind!

    My wife moved from Holland to the UK when she was six, and didnt know about it until they got on the ferry! At the time she was fine, and she still keeps in touch with her "best friend" now (some "20 something" years later). My brother moved to NZ two years ago (hence our move!), and his kids struggled a little at first (about 6 months), but now have much better & more wholesome friends than they had in the UK. His twin girls were 10 & his son was 6. His son wasnt bothered about going, just as long as he had his skateboard & football. His daughters are keen trampoliners & because NZs population is so much smaller found that their skill levels were comparably much higher in NZ & they were competing at National level, while in the UK they were at County level. So I guess that for a girl whos keen on playing footy, the same rules might apply. Their e-mail penpals back in the UK fizzled out pretty rapidly when they arrived. My brother pushed the ideal of some of their family friends coming to visit which seemed to boost moral before they went & when they first got there.

    In essence, I would try not to push the idea too hard.....let NZ sell itself to her, at her level.

    Cheers


    Nick

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    nattydread's Avatar
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    Default trying to alay the fears of my daughter...

    Thanks for al your replies..

    We took up an offer from someone for a penpal and she has been emailing back and forth..

    I think my wording of my original posting could have been better,.. She's not worried or stressed about it, she's not losing sleep about it or anything.

    She is excited about going, as we are. She loves looking at the pictures on here of the different places, We have a map of NZ pinned up on our bedroom wall and we're crossing off the weeks on my wifes University Timetable to when we can start the ball rolling.

    She , like us , is looking upon the whole thing as a big adventure, And BOY are we all looking forward to it.

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    Midder is offline Member
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    Default trying to alay the fears of my daughter...

    Hi Craig,

    we arrived in Auckland 5 days ago, and all the girls over here play football (or soccer) from a young age. Seems to be a popular past time on a Saturday. Our little girl is 6 and will start school at the end of July. We're originally from Dundee, and I start work as a midwife on July 11th, so can give your OH some info about working over here, and if any jobs come up.

    Could be good to keep in touch for both yourselves and your daughter.

    Hope to speak to you soon

    Nikki

  7. #7
    nattydread's Avatar
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    Default trying to alay the fears of my daughter...

    Yes definitely..

    I'll let you get settled in before I bombard you with questions.
    Glad you all got there in one piece.

    Good luck with it all..

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