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Thread: Guide to Political Correctness

  1. #1
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    Default Guide to Political Correctness

    We haven't had any rants about PC-ness for a while. If you're still unsure of your terminology, swot up here.

    A Criminal - unsavory character
    A Crook - morally (ethically) challenged
    Abortion - Near-Life Experience
    Alcoholic - Anti-Sobriety Activist
    Alive - temporarily metabolically abled.
    An Immigrant - a newcomer
    Assassination - involuntary term limitation
    Bald - comb-free
    Bald - folically independent
    Bald - follicularly challenged.
    Battle Fatigued - shellshocked
    Blind - optically darker
    Blind - photonically non-receptive
    Blind - visually challenged
    Body Odor - nondiscretionary fragrance.
    Broken Down Automobile - mechanically challenged
    Broken Home - Dysfunctional Family
    Bum - Displaced Homeowner
    Bum - Homeless Person
    Bum - Involuntarily Domiciled
    Cannibalism - Intra-Species Dining
    Censorship - Selective Speech
    Cheating - Academic Dishonesty
    China - Porcelain
    Chronically Late - Temporarily Challenged
    Clumsy - uniquely coordinated
    Commercial Fisherman - Flipper Whipper
    Computer Illiterate - Technologically Challenged
    Corpse - Permanently Static Post-Human Mass
    Corpse / Stiff - Metabolically Challenged
    Corpse / Stiff - Terminally Inconvenienced
    Cowardly - Challenge Challenged
    Cowboys - bovine control officers
    Crackpot - certified astrological consultant, certified crystal therapist, or certified past-life regression hypnotist
    Crime Rate - street activity index
    Dead - Actuarially Mature
    Dead - biologically challenged
    Dead - environmentally correct human
    Dead - living impaired
    Dead - metabolically challenged
    Dead - persons living with entropy
    Deaf - Visually Oriented
    Delicatessen - Corpse Farm
    Dirty Old Man - sexually focused chronologically gifted individual
    Dish Washer - utensil sanitizer
    Dishonest - Ethically disoriented.
    Dorm - Residence Hall
    Drooling Drunk Idiot - person on floor
    Drowning - aquatically challenged
    Drug Addict - Chemically Challenged
    Drunk - spacially perplexed
    Drunk / Junkie - in recovery
    Earthquake - geological correction
    Fail - achieve a deficiency.
    Fat - Differently Weighted
    Fat - gravitationally challenged
    Fat - horizontally challenged.
    Fat - horizontally gifted
    Fat - People of Mass
    Fat - person of substance
    Fictional / Mythological - ontologically challenged
    Freshman - first-year student
    Frog - amphibian American
    Full of Crap - fecally plenary
    Gang - Youth Group
    Garbage Man - sanitation engineer
    Gas Station Attendent - petroleum transfer technician
    Geek, Nerd, whatever... - socially challenged
    Ghetto / Barrio - Ethnically Homogenous Area
    Hamburger - Seared Mutilated Animal Flesh
    Handicapped - Differently Abled, Handi-Capable
    Having PMS - cyclically challenged
    Hearing Person - temporarily aurally abled
    Homeless - outdoor urban dwellers
    Homeless - residentially flexible
    Homelessness - Mortgage-Free Living
    Housebroken - Family Disfunction
    Housewife - domestic engineer
    Hunter - Animal Assassin
    Hunter - Bambi Butcher
    Hunter - Meat Mercenary
    Ignorant - factually unencumbered
    Ignorant - knowledge-based nonpossessor.
    Incompetent - Differently Qualified
    Incompetent - Specially Skilled
    Incompetent - Uniquely Proficient
    Insane People - Mental Explorers
    Insane People - Selectively Perceptive
    Insult - Emotional Rape
    Janitor - sanitation engineer
    Klutz - kinesthetically challenged
    Large Nose - nasally gifted
    Lazy - motivationally dispossessed
    Lazy - motivationally deficient.
    Learning Disability - Self-Paced Cognitive Ability
    Library - Educational Resource Center
    Logger - Wood Weasel
    Logger - Paper Pirate
    Logger -Treeslayer
    Loser - Second Place
    Loser - uniquely fortuned individual on an alternative career path
    Man-hole - maintenance hole
    Mankind - humankind
    MANkind, HuMAN, PerSON - Earth Children
    Mercy Killing - Euthanasia
    Mercy Killing - Putting Down/To Sleep/Out of Misery
    Messy - differently organized
    Meter Maid - Parking enforcer
    Midget / Dwarf - Little People
    Midget / Dwarf - Vertically Challenged
    Mute/Dumb - verbally challenged
    Not with somebody at the moment - romantically challenged
    Mother Bear

    Try to bloom wherever you are planted.

  2. #2
    MotherBear's Avatar
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    Default Re: Guide to Political Correctness

    Off - energy-efficient
    Old - chronologically gifted
    Old Person / Elderly - Gerontologically Advanced
    Old Person / Elderly - Senior Citizens
    Panhandler - Unaffiliated applicant for private-sector funding.
    Paper Bag - processed tree carcass
    Perverted - Sexually dysfunctional.
    Pimp-mobile / Low-rider - Culturally Responsive Transportation Option
    Plagiarism - Previously Owned Prose
    Po' - financially inept
    Policeman, Policewoman - law inforcement officer
    Poor - economically marginalized
    Poor - Economically Unprepared
    Poor - monetarily challenged
    Postman - letter carrier
    Pregnant - parasitically oppressed.
    Prisoner - client of the correctional system
    Prostitute - sex care provider
    Psychobabble - constructivist feminist psychotherapy
    Psychopath - socially misaligned
    Racist - genetically discriminating
    Really Big Nosed - nasally disadvantaged
    Redneck - person of region
    Redneck - rustically inclined
    Refugees - asylum seekers
    Road Kill - Vehicularly Compressed Maladapted Life Form
    Rudeness - Tact Avoidance
    Runny Nose - nasally gifted
    Senile Bag o' Bones - Alzheimer's Victim
    Serial-Killer - Person with difficult-to-meet needs.
    Shoplifter - Cost-of-Living Adjustment Specialist
    Short - vertically challenged
    Sighted Person - temporarily visually abled
    Slum - Economic Oppression Zone
    Slut - suffering from a sex addiction (female)
    Someone who has no other reason to park in a handicapped zone - morally handicapped
    Spendthrift - negative saver.
    Stained - creatively re-dyed
    Steward, Stewardess - flight attendant
    Stoned - Chemically inconvenienced.
    Stud - suffering from a sex addiction (male)
    Stupid - differently-brained
    Stupid - intellectually impaired
    The Elderly - Senior citizens
    Thin - horizontally challenged
    Thirsty - osmotically challenged
    Tone Deaf - musically delayed
    Too old/young - other aged
    Too Tall - people of height
    Tree-Hugger - environmental activist
    Trees - Oxygen Exchange Units
    Ugly - aesthetically challenged
    Ugly - Cosmetically different.
    Ugly - facially challenged
    Unemployed - Involuntarily leisured.
    Used Books - Recycled Books
    Vagrant - Nonspecifically destinationed individual.
    Vegetable - noble unconscious hero
    Vice President - Post-Coronary Leader of the Free World
    Vocal Minority - target equity group
    Vomiting - Unplanned Reexamination of Recent Food Choices
    Waiter, Waitress - food server
    War-Monger - Peacekeeper, patriot
    Welfare Bum - economically disadvantaged
    Whaler - Blubber Lover
    White - melanin-impoverished
    White American - racially challenged
    White Boy - rhythmically challenged
    White Trash - caucasian culturally-disadvantaged
    Wife - unpaid sex slave
    Worst - least best.
    Wrong - differently logical.
    Mother Bear

    Try to bloom wherever you are planted.

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