Housing complaints

[MotherBear]

[color=darkblue:5feb6dc874]The following appeared in the Daily Mail recently. They are extracts from a council tenants' complaints department:[/color:5feb6dc874]

I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was the wind the other night that blew them off.

My lavatory seat is cracked. Where do I stand?

I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.

Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen. 50 per cent of the walls are damp, 50 percent have crumbling plaster, and 50 percent are plain filthy.

I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.

The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.

Will you please send a man to look at my water. It is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.

It's the dogs' mess I find hard to swallow.

Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third, so please send someone round.

I am a single woman living downstairs. Would you do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.

I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction.

This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broken and we can't get BBC2.

The man next door has an unsightly erection in his front garden.

[cat_y2kn3]

lol some of them i found funny!!! hehe mad stuff you come up with!

[MotherBear]

:icon_biggrin: Just trying to jolly things along while everyone's waiting their turn to fly off to the Promised Land.

[fisheress]

Mother Bear!

You're fingers must be killing! You are always on this thing. Has Taffy been demoted? I hope you have broadband or if not, I dread your bill! Any way..... don't go away! You've really livened this thing up :043:

Fisheress

[MotherBear]

Hi Fisheress,
Yes, it must look like I?m welded to my keyboard [img:5921bd909f]http://www.clicksmilies.com/s0105/spezial/Fool/lam.gif[/img:5921bd909f]. I often get embarrassed about seeing my name up there repeatedly, like a list, but sometimes it?s so quiet on here that I feel obliged to pipe up again about something or other just to try to keep things moving. I originally only came on here to ?cover? for Taffy and Welshgirl while they were in the UK and I seem to have got carried away a bit :icon_redface: . Never thought I?d find enough to write about, but just shows you how much rubbish I?m capable of spouting in such a short time. Taffy certainly hasn?t been demoted, as he?s the only one out of both of us that knows what he?s talking about. He?s just been very busy lately with trying to catch up on work and now he has Welshgirl back home again I should think they have a bit of catching up to do themselves.

See you?re still busy with those jobs applications. [img:5921bd909f]http://www.smiliegenerator.de/s28/smilies-11775.png[/img:5921bd909f] Keep up the good work.