Time to flee the coming freeze in Britian?

And there's more:

Below are supposedly real Computer Help Line calls.........

THE COMPUTER HELPDESK PHONE SERVICE

Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one...

******
Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note."
Customer: No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet.. it's still on
my
desk... Sorry...

******
Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?

******
Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello.! .. I can't print.
Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill
Gates dang it!

******
Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print Every time
I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed
it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says it can't find it...

******
Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah...................Thank you.

******
Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.

******
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer: Okay.
Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes.
Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another
keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work!

******
Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter
V
as in Victor, and the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

******
A customer couldn't get on the Internet:
Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.

******
Helpdesk: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Helpdesk: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.

******
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has put a screensaver on my
computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!

*******
And then there is my personal favorite!!

Helpdesk: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the
circle around it?

[quote:1c494ebf29="Welshgirl"]
use a computer. Not a fable - this was a court case in the states when the
techie sued for wrongful dismissal.[/quote:1c494ebf29]

I'm afraid that it is
http://www.snopes.com/humor/business/wordperf.htm

here is the very first post of the event,

it has been much enlaraged on over the years, but the famous phrase "You're too stupid to own a computer" was actually only a fantasy of the guyhttp://www.progress.demon.co.uk/Fun/Trouble-with.html

Ok, so it's not true (the joke was copied and pasted from an e-mail I received, so it's not necessarily my opinion, nor did I necessarily believe it to be true), but it's still funny......

Same with the second posting of jokes - all copied and pasted, so if there is any incorrect information in there, please take it with a pinch of salt.

rofl ....oh gosh, that is awesome. I'm reading the stuff on the links now. how stupid can people GET??!! :044: